


In London

by dizzy



Category: Glee RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-19
Updated: 2012-12-19
Packaged: 2017-11-21 13:18:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/598201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sort of loosely based around comments Chris made in that AE interview about SBL, though it has absolutely nothing to do with klaine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In London

"So if we'd met in high school and gotten together then, you wouldn't have wanted to make sure we went to the same college?" Darren asks as soon as Chris picks up his phone.    
  
Chris bites back a sigh. He sort of wishes he hadn't answered. He can ignore tweets and facebook posts, but he can't not answer the phone for Darren. Well, he could, but Darren would probably just show up at his house or find out when Chris had to be on set and hunt him down then. "No, I wouldn't have," he answers honestly.    
  
Darren is silent.    
  
"Does that upset you?" Chris asks.    
  
"I don't know." Darren finally says. "Maybe. A little bit. Yeah."    
  
"Would you have gone anywhere besides Michigan for me?" Chris asks.    
  
"Fuck. Who knows? I would have talked you into going there, I think. You'd have fit in great there," Darren says.    
  
"I wouldn't have gotten in." Chris tries not to let salt leak into the old wound. "So it's probably a good thing we didn't meet in high school, now isn't it?"    
  
"What about now?" Darren asks. "If Glee got canceled tomorrow and you got some tv gig in, fuck, London or something..."    
  
"I'd go to London," Chris says, simply.    
  
"Really?"    
  
"Yeah." Chris grows a little uncomfortable with how dejected Darren sounds about that. He's defensive when he says, "You wouldn't turn down a huge career move like that. What if you got offered a worldwide tour that took you away for half the year? You wouldn't turn it down."     
  
Darren sighs. "Look, I gotta go."    
  
"Of course. We're still on for dinner later?" Chris asks. He hopes so; the rest of his week is full already. Between the movie and everything else, it could be well into the next week before he'd be free again.    
  
"Yeah, sure," Darren says, and hangs up.    
  
*    
  
They don't have dinner later.    
  
Darren cancels.    
  
Chris sits in his living room and stares at his cat, a growing sense of dread inside of him.    
  
*    
  
Sometimes, Chris thinks, he can be sort of stupid.    
  
Sometimes things take a while to process.    
  
Outside, daylight fades and he doesn't bother turning on the light. Brian curls up across his leg and starts to purr, warmth and reassuring weight. Chris lets his fingers sink into the fur and looser skin along the back of his neck and Brian purrs harder, kneading his claws in.    
  
He tries to think about life if he didn't get to see Darren every day, or close to it. The casual touch, the kisses, the sex.    
  
The nice thing about Darren, the thing that makes this work when other attempts with other people have failed, is that Darren has never really asked Chris for much of anything. A little bit of time, once in a while, but never so much that Chris feels suffocated. Darren is just sort of there - making himself available when he can, apologizing and making it up later when he can't.    
  
It's all overwhelming casual until Chris contemplates not having it at all.    
  
*   
  
If he were in London, they'd still be able to talk. It's not like either of them would cease to exist.    
  
That might even be enough for Chris, but Darren wouldn't last too long in a long distance relationship. Darren craves touch like Chris craves... actually, Chris doesn't crave much of anything beyond a certain kind of soft drink, so maybe that's the problem. If Darren didn't pick up the phone for a week, Chris would probably be okay.    
  
To begin with.    
  
But when he thinks about forever - about losing that, for good, it hurts. It's a sneaky kind of hurt, creeping up out of nowhere and socking him in the gut. Brian mewls in protest when Chris pets a little too hard.    
  
It's half past ten when Chris throws on a hoodie over his t-shirt and a pair of jeans. He slips his feet into sneakers with no socks and locks his door behind him, getting into his car and driving without stopping until he's parked in front of Darren's house. There are a couple other cars there. Darren's is one of them.   
  
Darren hadn't given a reason for canceling. Chris hadn't asked.   
  
A light by the front door flicks on, then turns off. Another minute passes and then Darren is jogging out. He's wearing ridiculous pastel patterned shorts and a completely mismatching t-shirt.    
  
"Chris?" He asks, confused.    
  
Chris gets out of his car. "I'm not moving to London."    
  
Darren laughs. "Uh, good to know?"    
  
"I mean." Chris takes a breath. He shuts his car door, then leans against it. Then leans too far, stumbles, and stands up straight.    
  
Darren is laughing at him. "Come inside?"    
  
Chris shakes his head. "I won't stay long. I just wanted to say... I wouldn't take a job in London unless I could talk you into coming, too."    
  
"... I like London," Darren says, slowly. "It wouldn't be too hard, you know. To talk me into coming."    
  
"And if you got a worldwide music tour or something..." Chris offers him a hesitant smile. "There are plenty of places in the world I haven't seen yet."    
  
"You could be a roadie," Darren teases. He steps in closer, putting a hand on Chris's arm. "Follow me around and sleep in the bus."    
  
"There'd be plenty of time for me to write." Chris risks a wider smile.    
  
"So, just to make sure I'm not misreading this, you're saying-"    
  
"I'm saying..." Chris takes another breath, deeper. This feels like a big thing, but it's just words, he reminds himself. Just words, with intent behind them, like all good words should have. "I'm saying I'd want to try and figure it out. If... I got a job in London. Or if-"    
  
"Or if I got a huge tour," Darren finishes. "Okay, good. Because it was bumming me out, thinking you didn't... you wouldn't want to... make it work."    
  
Darren looks insufferably pleased and sort of like he wants to kiss Chris, except they're standing outside in his neighborhood, so he doesn't.    
  
Speaking of. Even this would look suspicious. "I should go."    
  
Darren just nods and backs off like he always does.    
  
Chris licks his lips. "You could come with me."    
  
It's hard for him to ask. It's always hard, it never gets easier.    
  
But wow, the way Darren's face lights up. Chris smiles back because he's helpless to do anything but.    
  
There's really no one else he'd rather see London with.


End file.
